2 Weeks!

I can't believe that we've managed to survive for a whole two weeks... It's been a time of tears, laughter, scary moments, sleepless nights, but above all things, it's been a time of love, learning and discoveries!
Eva is a little gem. She does what a baby is suppose to do: countless number ones and number twos, cries, sleeps... She is a lovely little one...
She did put on the weight she'd lost in the first 10 days of her life, which had worried us a lot since it was more than the 10% specialist talk about...She was weighed for the first time on thursday 22 October and by Sunday 25 October, she nearly reached the weight she was at birth... Althought my milk suppky does not match her demand (I'm not producing enough milk)I'm still persevering and she's getting boob every 2 1/2 hours during the day and ocassionally is topped up with up to 4 ounces of formula... At night, she manages 4 hours sleep at a time. She is a happy little one and my wee eating machine :)



She is also a very strong baby! I've discovered she "crawls" to the side of her crib and a couple of nights ago, i got the fright of my life when I suddenly woke up in a panic and I found her tiny face was pressed against the bars of the crib! Is amazing how she can bend her knees and roll her legs to one side... The arm and shoulder follow and voilá! She is on her side... Something to watch out for and to keep an extra eye on her..!



It must be the fact hat she is our daughter why I think she is the cleverest little person in the whole world... She already found her fingers to suck when she wants to fall asleep while comfort sucking! Ocassionally I have to use the old trusty dummy so she can get the comfort, otherwise I can spend up to 3 hours with her stuck on my breast just for the extra heat :) (which I don't mind during the day, but it gets too tiring at night, wouldn't you agree?)



Anyway... Today is two weeks since Eva joined our world... It's been a rollercoaster of emotions and changes, but I wouldn't change it for anything! I have to be extra thankful to Frazer for being the best and more supportive husband in the universe... I LOVE YOU, BABY!!!!
And we love you all for caring about us :)
See you soon!
Love
Eva, a very special Daddy, a Mum that loves Daddy, baby and the doggies like nobody else, and the 2 dogs that are still wondering what's the little thing that cries!

One Week of Eva!

Describing being a new mum is not an easy task, but can be resumed in a brief sentence: Hard work... The past week has been full of wonderful feelings: joy, a kind of love that know no boundaries, excitement, happiness... But has also being filled up with fear, exhaustion, tears, desperation and lots of doubts as to "am I doing things right?"... Breastfeeeding has proven to be quite challenging for me. Although Eva latched on from day one on a proper way, I still don't know if she is getting what she needs from me... She seems to be suckling all the time and is tiring...
So far, We have had more than a couple of sleepless nights and I have even had to use a bote of formula and a dummy to help things to be easier... I feel terribly guilty for what I've done, but the good thing is She is still on the breast (and I'm not giving up!).
She is a wonderful and fascinating little one... She spends some time with eyes open, and her silly mummy just stares at her and speak funny voices and silly conversations to her..! What can I say, I'm under a spell!!!
On Saturday night, the umbilical cord came off, thanks God my sister was here to help me out (she stayed with me for the weekend) otherwise I'd probably pass out!

Eva is here!!!

And I know you want the details, but time is limited and I'm sure you all prefer to see the "evidence"...
A little synopsis: everything went fine and we are all ok... Eva was born by cesarean section at 1:18 am on Tuesday 13th October 2009. A healthy 7 pounds 1 ounce (or 3.200 Kg) baby!!!
More stories later :)
Thanks for following!!!
Lots of Love
Eva and a couple of parents deeply in love with a little one!

40+4

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our life... And this ime is different... I don't feel like crying, the excitement has changed! Is not that I'm less scared, it's just that I'm ready, and Eva is ready!
After all the changing, moving, shifting that the little one have done over the past 2 weeks, It turned out she moved again!
The story is as follows:
On Friday 09 October I went to my antenatal appointment with a GP from the practice at Dollar (Dr Meetin) and she did the examination as there was no appointments available to see the midwife. Anyway: measuring was fine, blood pressure and urine were fine... But then she noticed that the head was still quite high up... Eva was not engaged yet... So she said it was a mattr of wait and see... However, I asked if there was any chance the baby would move and revert to breech... The Doctor said "yes"...
The following night, as I went to visit our neighbours, I noticed my bump was quite high and that my shortness of breath has, for some reason, returned! I thought it was quite odd, but I took it calmly... Sunday was a different story all together... I felt that baby had moved out the cephalic and was breech again... I phoned Triage and they told me just to wait until friday for my next appointment witn the consultant... I was not happy with the suggestion, but nonetheless, I just accepted it...
It was Frazer, on a very wise move, that suggested to phone the Dr's practice today and get seen by them, so they could feel if baby was breech or not, but the prectice was closed for the day. However, Frazer insisted on me phoning the hospital... And I did... I knew that playing the "I think baby has changed position" card was not going to work, so I used the "the movements have decreased since yesterday"... they agreed to see me straight away...
A lovely senior midwife and a fab student took care of me as soon as I arrived... And at first the student had the chance of feeling my tummy... "I think I can feel a head up here, near the ribcage"... The Senior Mudwife followed: "I think baby is breech again... I'll do a scan"... They strapped me on monitors: hearbeat fine and plenty movement (of course, Eva was displaying a burst of energy as soon as the midwives had a look to my bump!) Eventually, a scan confirmed that the head was near my ribcage, on the left hand side! It was soooo surprising, that she was looking for a second head, juet in case I was having twins!!! hahahaha!!!
Anyway, the consultant came and asked if I was ok for a c-section tomorrow! And without giving it too much thougths my answer was a straight forward "yes, I'm ready"...
I was guaranteed that, regardless the little one shifting postion again, she is coming out throught the window this time!!!
So, here I am, enjoying my last pregnant night and preparing for a future of joy with my beloved Husband, my beautiful Dogs and my strong minded and wonderful baby girl!
See you all once we are back!!!
LOVE YOUUUUUUU!!!
The Barnes Ramirez

Another day!

Still intact, still as a whole (and a whale, a happy whale)... Living the moment, the intimate one, the one without having to share her, the one without having to see how somebody else takes her to give her love... Being selfish, I suppose, having her only for myself and viceversa... She feels secure, and I smile... I smile and pray for her to come soon so I can kiss her just as I kiss her when I dream her...
Feeling as the prisoner on death row whose faith has been postponed...
Still intact, still scared... Playing by ear, playing the game, the waiting game...

The Waiting Game

Well... After all, the 2nd of October is not such a cool date... Who would like to share a birthday with Ghandi? And anyway it was raining and cold outside!
Eva decided she was not to be born yesterday and instead gave us the surprise (and a glimpse of what her personality may be like) to turn herself round and position her head on the birth channel (although she was not engaged yet)... I think she will miss the inside of the bump as much as I will miss her being there! We arrived early at the Hospital, I went upstairs (via the lift, of course) and checked myself in Ward 19 at Stirling Royal Infirmary... In a matter of 5 minutes, I was wearing a (horrible) dressing gown and sitting on a hospital bed. Frazer joined in after parking the car... A student midwife came to see me and started asking questions: Am I wearing jewellery, make up (I thought it was pretty obvious that I was not wearing any: I LOOKED HORRIBLE!!!), etc, etc, etc... Then, came in the anesthesiologist to explain tehe type of anesthetics I was to receive that day: a spinal block. Eventually Frazer left to get my sister (who was at the car park feeding Giovanna)and in less that 2 minutes after he left, I was told that I was ready to be wheeled down to theatre. AND MY SISTER WAS NOT THERE!!! Eventually she arrived, just in time to receive the surgical team and off she went to change heself into the scrubs)... A really nice bunch of people... The team leader asked a training doctor to feel the breech, and hands on my tummy, the apprentice said: I don't think there's a breech here! Then the big guy took the scan machine and put the gel on my belly and as soon as he put the probe on the lower part of my abdomen, his words were: "that's the head" SAY WHAT??? So, after countless weeks being comfortable on a breech position, lying with her head on my right hand side, Eva decided to disguise a strategic turn with tons of movements in less than 2 days!!! Whan Valentina was back, wearing the (gigantic) scrubs, I told her: don't dress up, you are not going anywhere!...
And that's we have entered the waiting game!
I'm still scared and happy and have decided that, after hearing a woman being in agony with contractions, I'm going for an epidural! Is just a matter of knowing when :)
See you soon!!!

2 October

I can not stop crying... Anything will set me off! I feel heartbroken, overwhelmed, deliriously happy and extremely scared!!!
I woke up at 4:30 am today for a quick trip to the toilet. Being naive, I thought I was gonna be able to go back to sleep. Instead I stayed in bed, cuddling an awake Frazer that was asking if that's was me already! Eventually I got off the bed and started walking around the house, shedding tiny tears of happiness and feeling ridiculously silly for being crying for no reason!
I then started checking facebook, and that gave me another excuse to cry some more... Thank you all for your kind words and the good vibe I've received trough your messages!
To top things up, my sweet granny phoned in at 7:57 am (that's roughly 2:00 am in Venezuela) Bless her! She wanted to check on us and wish me the best and also to give my first kiss to the little one on her behalf (at this moment I think I'll spend the whole day giving her kisses on behalf of people plus my own ones!!!)
While Eva was moving earlier on, I had this sudden thought (and I know now is for real) that I'm going to miss my bump!!! I'll miss her moving around, wiggling her toes, stretching her arms and sticking her head out! I'm going to miss being uncomfortable in bed, rubbing cream on my pregnant belly... I'm gonna miss it a lot...Anyway, I should love you and leave you!!! I'm almost off to be a mum (after my little tenant gets evicted!!!!)
I'll leave you with a couple of pictures that, amongst some other things, shows you that never mind how good you could have looked throughout pregnancy, on the day of the delivery your face swell and you look like a pig :)
Still feeling good, tho ;)
PS: Thank you Google for letting me know that my little one will share birthday with M. Gandhi!!! HOW COOL IS THAT!!!

Love you all!!!

Just a Few Hours Away...

As I was going to the toilet, I thought I better write down how I'm feeling today, just a few hours away for holding my baby... I can't deny I've got a lump in my throat and on more that one occasion, I'd shed a tear or two and I'm still crying... I'm excited, anxious, happy and hyper, but at the same time I'm calmed and relaxed... I'm scared and hopeful... I'm terrified of today as this is the last day of my life as I've known it! Is that not a reason enough to be afraid?
Tomorrow will be the beginning of a wonderful stage of our life... I don't know how it's going to be like and, although I'm looking forward to it, being conscious that this is it: we are no longer Frazer and Verónica, but a family, makes me a bit frightened...
It's funny, thought... All this years dreaming with this moment, thinking, reading, preparing about it... And when the time comes, I have no idea as of what to expect, how to react or what to do!!!
I'm scared and happy, relaxed and nervous, crying and laughing... Loving my husband with a different love: a stronger love... Loving my dogs and my family... But above everything, loving the fact that this will be the last time I write on this blog carrying my bump as a mum-to-be...
See you next time, as soon as Eva let me write something!!!
Love you all!
Thank you for following the blog!!!